The Evaluation One

The Loop

Hello Everyone. 

So... I've decided to do a short series. Do enjoy. 


Once every decade, a new batch was brought into the Evaluation hall. David walked in, his gait made slightly unsteady with fright as he wondered if he could make it this time. The Evaluation hall was a monstrosity. Standing at the entrance, one could never see the end, but as you walked in, the massive structure appeared to reduce in size. It was empty, devoid of any trappings, but as you got to the middle, if you squinted, you might see a large scale standing, right there was the source of the fear David and every other inmate felt. There was Assidyna, standing in all his glory, slowly beckoning them forward. He didn’t have to speak, they knew what to do, place your palm on one end of the scale, if it remained steady, then you could get a 24 hour visit to earth, after which your actions in those 24 hours would determine if you were going to the next stage of your after-life or if you would remain at your current stage.

You see, there are 3 paths one could go after death: heaven, hell or the after-life and its 5 stages. If you found yourself in the after-life, you start at stage 5, every decade you are evaluated and either move up to the next stage or not. After stage 1, you either found yourself in heaven or hell. You’d think it was a easy but it’s crazy how many mistakes one could make despite giving fresh starts every decade.

David was in stage 5. With every step that took him to the scale, he felt his insides quiver. For the past 50 years, each time he came up to the scale he was found wanting. He approached the scale, placing his palm with trepidation. For a few seconds the scale swung lazily, he held his non-existent breath, only heaving a sigh of relief when it steadied.

Assidynia nodded at him and suddenly, he felt like he was being sucked into a whirlpool of nothingness. He felt his life flash past him; a young dashing Nigerian soldier who he remembered was himself. Rifle cocked, a young Biafran woman on the floor; thrashing round and begging for mercy. The soldier standing before her, laughing at her helplessness, then unzipping his fly and forcing himself into her, thrusting with a vengeance, a baby crying and wailing, baby being raised by the feet and head dashed to the wall till its head became squashed paw-paw. More scenes of rapes and violence. A date popped into his head ‘10th January 1970’, the day he had died, just 5 days before the end of the Nigerian civil war.


David felt a hand lightly pressing down on his nipple, reflex kicked in and he grabbed it, twisting back forcefully.

A deep voice yelped. “Babe.” He dropped the hand, jerking up in surprise. He cast his eyes about, trying to get a feel of his surroundings. He was in a large room, beside him on the bed was a good looking man who was now scowling at him. He let out a shriek and jumped out of the bed, catching sight of an adjourning door, he rushed in and shut it behind him. On looking around, he realized it was a bathroom, a large mirror stared back at him and he slowly inched forward. Staring back at him was a gaunt face, framed by long braids. He raised a slightly trembling hand to push the braids from his face for a better look, letting out another gasp. He had large eyes, thick lips and a heaving bosom that seemed ill fitting for such a thin person.

 A knock sounded at the door and the voice from earlier said; “Cassie, are you okay?” when she didn’t answer, he continued, “Please open the door.”

Confusion swirled inside him, no, Her, and she took a deep breath to gather herself. At least now he knew her name, Cassie. David opened the door and stepped out gingerly, getting a closer look at the man. He was good looking in a way he was certain drove females wild. David wondered if he was Cassie’s husband or boyfriend.



To be continued... 

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